Becoming a Family: An Adoption Story

By Beth Puricelli

When my husband Stephen and I first moved to Port-de-Paix, Haiti in 2009, we had no idea how God would change our lives and form our family. We went to Haiti to serve as missionary teachers in a school; but little did we know, we held our future children countless times before God had orchestrated our adoption. On our second day in Haiti, we made the first of many visits to a local orphanage in town where we met Ella and Elline.

After the devastating earthquake of 2010, most of the children who had begun the adoption process were taken out of the orphanage immediately. Additional adoptions were finalized over the course of the next two years, and our girls—never placed in a forever family—were left behind as their friends went to live in their new, permanent homes.

As we entered the Fall of 2012, our fourth school year in Haiti, God spoke far more clearly to our hearts about the girls’ need for parents. However Haitian law included an age restriction that exempted Stephen and me from adopting—we needed to be 35 years old and married for at least 10 years. On top of that, I never dreamed I could have been a good candidate to adopt twin 4-year-olds, having never been a parent before. So, I asked God to send a strong couple for Elline and Ella to call their mom and dad.

Still, I couldn’t shake the seemingly foolish feeling that I should be their mother.

He Still Speaks

I have found that sometimes God speaks most clearly when our prayers critically need an answer. In December 2012, we traveled back to the U.S. as Stephen interviewed for a position at Southeast Christian Church’s Southwest Campus. During that time, I decided to print pictures of the girls and give them to my family, asking them to pray that Ella and Elline would receive parents soon. All the while, I still quietly wondered if God wanted me to be their mom. When my mother took the copy of the picture I gave to her, she opened her Bible and placed it inside as a reminder to pray.

When Stephen took the job at Southeast, we knew our time in Haiti was running out. When we returned from Louisville, we only had a few short months before we would move back to the United States. So I begged God to make it abundantly clear whether or not we should pursue the girls’ documents in Haiti, seeing if Social Services would make an exception to the age limit.

For months I prayed. As I sought God’s voice, He used a Bible study to bring me to Habakkuk 2:3: “For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.”

It was clear to me. I believed God was speaking through His Word to answer my prayers: “…it will certainly come...” To ensure I wasn’t just crazy, I emailed my mom to let her know how I felt God was speaking through His Word. After receiving the email, she opened her Bible and flipped through the Old Testament to Habakkuk. There, stuck in the very same page as the words of Habakkuk 2:3, was the photo of the girls I’d given her a week before. My mom had no doubt—God had spoken! And that was only the first of many miracles that followed.

As we met with Haitian adoption officials, it became evident that no exception could be made for the age restriction. But within a few months, we heard a rumor that Haiti was proposing changes to its adoption laws. Sure enough, one of those changes included lowering the age requirement, which would allow us to adopt! When it was time for us to move to Louisville in March 2013, the law change still remained a proposal. I lamented the fact that there was no guarantee it would ever be changed at all.

Lingering Hope

As that verse in Habakkuk states, “…Though it linger…”—and it did linger!—it wasn’t until six months later that we celebrated the law change that could allow us to adopt. But the age limit wasn’t the only change made to the law. Haiti also implemented a clause restricting children from being adopted by people who have previously known them, in order to protect orphans from being adopted for wrong and abusive reasons.

Our U.S. adoption coordinator agreed to support our proposal, knowing we’d lived and worked in Haiti and knew many members of the community who would attest toour intent and character. While it wasn’t impossible, our coordinator admitted the chance of us adopting the girls would be “a shred above a miracle.” But God’s Word had convinced me: “…it will certainly come…” So we waited. And hoped. And prayed.

A year later, I listened to broken English on a fuzzy phone call from Haiti one Saturday morning, and it was undoubtedly the happiest phone call I have ever received. It finally happened: we were officially placed with our girls! Even after our adoption was secured, the wait continued two and a half more years. During that time, I traveled 16 times to their orphanage and never missed a birthday.

In those years of waiting and hoping, faithful prayer warriors surrounded us every step of the way. During a critical point in the adoption process, a faith-filled woman opened her home and invited friends to pray for the girls. As we approached the end of our long journey, the ladies of the Southwest Campus held a shower for us. It takes special people to think outside the box and throw a shower for soon-to-be nine-year-olds. We’ve never felt so loved.

Then, on January 13, 2017, Ella and Elline finally came home with us to Louisville. In many ways, it was the end of one journey and the beginning of another. As much as we wanted to shield our girls during that process, so much of their childhood had been characterized by significant losses and grief. As their mom, I can now shoulder some of the burdens they’ve carried and help them process through the pain of the past, giving them security in knowing they are loved no matter what.

Calling Out

God has taught me so much through our adoption process. I learned that He still speaks to His children. And He does so in mighty, miraculous ways. If you’re facing something big in your life, ask Him to speak. For years, I longed to hear the girls call me “Mom.” In the same way, God longs to hear us call out to Him, “Father!”

If you feel like God may be calling you to adopt, call out to Him. Pray about it. Don’t just pass off the thought as foolish or crazy. Instead of wondering “What if?” and living with regret, follow His call in obedience. If you’re afraid, know that there is a child out there waiting for a family—and they’re undoubtedly far more afraid than you are. You could be God’s answer to their prayers.

Being part of Jesus’ work of redeeming the messiness of life on earth is painstakingly arduous and terribly humbling. It might possibly be the most difficult thing you’ve ever done. But, without a doubt, it will be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever done. For me, it is an absolute honor to be Elline and Ella’s mom.